Moving to the other side of the world can be a lonely experience:
- being unable to speak to others in the language you are used to
- being unable to reach your friends and family for most of the waking hours
- being unable to immediately relate culturally to the people and structures around you
Before I had children, I was generally quite happy to be on my own for extended periods. I guess even then, that was safe in the knowledge that everyone I ever loved and cared about were at most a taxi, or eventually a flight, away. Calling bridged that gap very nicely too.
Until now, I had never been away from my wife or my kids for any more than a couple of weeks, and even then, not all of them at one time. Now I'm separated from them, until they can join me. Going from being around your loved ones 24/7 to calling twice at the tail ends of each day, is a dramatic and uncomfortable shift. Learning how it feels to miss specific people for the first time can be quite jarring.
In my case it's not forever, but it can feel like it at times. It's important to pause and consider these feelings as they arise. All feelings have their place, and they all deserve acknowledgment.
It's not great to feel like this, but it's okay. And it'll all be okay.